Mucky hiker hitching West along the M65,
She's got seamen (semen) on her chest and Morecambe (more come) on her sign
She said she'd got her menstrual cycle, I said: "You'd better flog it"
Didn't want to make a meal of her, so I gave her a lump of hot fish yoghurt
I bet she comes from Macclesfield
Filthy, fat and flatulent, she couldn't make a decent brew,
Ugly as a pig, she couldn't cook a j** (coo-ca-choo)
Its no wonder they call them pigs, look at the way she grunts
She thinks she's posh, but she's like a tampon,
Coz they're both just stuck-up c*nts
I bet she comes from Macclesfield
Turned out she owned a pub in London, called the Old White Hart
She became my Maid of Ale
But I had to put up with her fishy c*nt farts