It's Christmas time
And Santa's here
making the children smile
But he's just a pedophile,
So you better watch your child
Christmas trees in every house
covered in shiny lights
but they just turn brown and die
or set your whole house on fire
These are the reasons
I hate the seasons
But, I'mma give it a try!
Maybe this year I won't be sad on Christmas,
Maybe I'll have a happy holiday-ay-ay
Replace my heart ache and my pain
With mistletoe and candy cane,
This Christmas could go my way,
Having fun with all your friends
Sipping on that eggnog,
but it just looks like jizz
all over your upper lips,
House made out of gingerbread,
cookies like Christmas trees,
giving your heart disease,
an' type 2 di-ah-betes,
(It's not like diabetes)
These are the reasons,
I hate the seasons,
but I'mma give it a try!
Maybe this year
I won't be sad on Chirstmas
Maybe I'll have a happy holiday-ay-ay
Replace my heart ache and my pain
With mistletoe and candy cane
This Christma**s, could go my way
I've never seen reindeer fly,
I've never heard the sleigh-bell ring
Never seen a snowman come to life,
I've never heard the angels sing,
But I hope and I pray
that maybe this Christmas day,
That'll change!
Maybe this year I won't be sad on Christmas,
Maybe I'll have a happy holiday-ay-ay
Replace my heart ache and my pain,
With mistletoe and candy canes
This Christmas is going my way!
Maybe this year I won't be sad on Christmas,
Maybe I'll have a happy holiday-ay-ay
Replace my heart ache and my pain,
Let's just dance the night away
This Christmas is going my way-ay-ay-ay-ay!
Just dance with me