Both: ♪ You and I are so awfully diff'rent ♪ ♪ too awfully different, to ever be pals ♪
Stewie: Do you want to go first?
Brian: Yeah, I'll go. ♪ Your favorite hero is the Marquis de Sade ♪
Stewie: Oh, you're one to talk. ♪ You get a stiffy ♪ ♪ from Phylicia Rashad ♪
Brian: Oh, one time *PING*
Stewie: ♪ I've a style flair, just look at my hip hair ♪
Brian: Oh yeah, that's quite a nice 'do there
Stewie: Oh thanks
Brian: (as Triumph the Insult Comic Dog) For me to poop on!
Stewie: What?
Brian: (normal voice) Oh c'mon you look like Charlie Brown
Stewie: Bite me, Snoopy
Both: ♪ There's not - a whole lot - that we've got, to agree on ♪
Brian: ♪ 'Cause I love the strings of a cla**ical score. ♪
Stewie: ♪ And I like that singer who looks like a who*e. ♪
Brian: Ricky Martin?
Stewie: Love him.
Both: ♪ We're too different to ever be pals ♪♪ You and I are ♪
Locals: ♪ Dododo ♪
Both: ♪ so awfully different ♪
Locals: ♪ Dododo ♪
Both: ♪ Too awfully different ♪
Locals: ♪ Dododo ♪
Both: ♪ to ever be pals ♪
Locals: ♪ Dododo dodo dodo dooyo dodo ♪
Brian: ♪ Your head's as ma**ive as a meteorite ♪
Stewie: Oh, very funny. ♪ You have a weenie like a Christmas tree light ♪
Brian: ♪ I bet money, you'll marry a honey ♪ ♪ Who's pretty and funny ♪ ♪ And her name will be Ted ♪
Stewie: Oh a gay joke!.
Brian: I just work with what you give me.
Both: ♪ You might think we're in sync ♪ ♪ But we stink, as a duo ♪
Brian: ♪ 'Cause you get a kick out of carnage and guts ♪
Stewie: ♪ And you get a kick out of stroking your... ♪
Brian: Whoa, whoa, whoa, you can't say that on TV
Stewie: What? Ego?
Brian: Never mind
Both: ♪ We're too different to ever be pals ♪