[Verse 1]
What the hell is wrong with me?
I'm not who I want to be
But I tried spot cream an' I tried it all
I'm crawling up the wall!
[Chorus]
What's my name?
Name?[x2]
[Verse 2]
I tried to join a ping-pong club
Sign on the door said all full up!
I got nicked, fighting in the road
And the judge didn't even know
[Chorus]
[Verse 3]
Dad got pissed so I got clocked
Couldn't hear the Tannoy so he lost the lot
Offers Mum a bribe through the letter box
Drives you f**ing mad
Now I'm round the back of your house at night
Peeping in the window, are you sleeping tight?
I laugh at your locks with my celloid strip
And you won't know who came
[Chorus][x2]