[Verse 1: Andrew]
The sunlight makes my eyes crack open
Man I wish I could just rewind that
Back to last night, my memory, can I find that?
Did I come home with a dime piece or a dime sack?
Either way, man, I can't remember
Nothing at all, not even what I had for dinner
Or who I sat next to with the tightest figure
Or if I gave her a rose like my name was Sigur
Or if we left without paying our tab
Or if we made out the whole way in the cab
Man this must've had to been
A girl that I would see again
Make it feel like me and her was -ous
I'm talking like tremend
I guess I'll never know who graced me with her presence
The mystery unsolved, leaving me guessing seconds
Damn, a note, she left it on my dresser
Let's see what it says: “I've had better”
[Hook]
I've never felt like this
It's like I'm twelve feet tall
It's the morning after
I totally bagged her after all
And everything's great
Everything's fine
She got hers
And I got mine
[Verse 2: Travis]
Wake up in my bed, but wait, Andrew's there too
Don't remember sh**, man, what did we do?
I ask him if he f**ed me, is this considered a rape?
Or did he have the courtesy to first take me on a date?
He says “Wake up young dude! May not be bad as you say
What if there was a chick? A devil's three-way!”
So there was still hope that there had been no sodomy
Ought to be a way to figure it out, there's just got to be
We jump out of bed, minds racing like Dale Jr
I made a joke about morning wood, some failed humor
In the living room, it's just the dog and us
And we both have the same thought and say “Oh, f**”
This might've happened, we're gonna have to deal
With the fact that one or both of us might've copped a feel
But just as we were both filled to the brim with grief
Out the kitchen walked Dean's sister, we high-fived with relief
[Hook]
[Verse 3: Dean]
When I arise in the AM to slay some f**ing Cheerios
The last thing that I want to see is a seedy ho
Using my pillow and laying under my sheets
Like she shouldn't have left right after we did the deed
Wish I could tell you to leave without speaking a word
But I can't, so I'll say “Get the f** out! Ya heard?”
Damn, it feels good to get that sh** out my house
So I can start to forget what I did when I was out
Cause it's the morning after and I feel like Lebron
Think I hollered at my boy's girl and also his mom?
I went hard in the paint because my sh** is the bomb
I pour drinks for my team cause we're already on
And I'ma do it again even if I got cla** in the morn'
This sh**'s so damn easy, man, I swear that it gets boring
Go to cla** still drunk but I ace my test
Aw yeah, you're goddamn right I'm the best
[Verse 4: Cheldon McQueen]
Woke up with no shirt and the lights on
Pants in the corner, tube socks, and some Nikes on
Stretched and thought “Who the f** left the lights on?”
Looked to my right and saw a chick with some tights on
Looking more electrifying than Raichu
Panties on top of a tripod with a Nikon
And my right arm had two arms right beside it
Just happened to be two white chicks
With more booty than a pirate
There's a bloodstain on my tee
This is feeling like an opening scene
Of Hangover 3, did someone drug me?
Or is it some dream? There's five b**hes in here
And not one is ugly
Oh, jumped out of the bed wiping confetti out my hair
Then my phone start ringing, it's my girlfriend
She's outside, know I'm here cause the light's on
f**, let me press play on this Nikon, see what happened