Going on a date
I really can't be late
Gotta get some flowers
After I get some food
(Do-do-do-do-do, eating at McDonald's)
God, I really needed that
But I'm already late, oh, crap!
Have to come up with an excuse
After I get more food
(Mmm, now I'm eating at Wendy's)
I'm fifteen minutes late
She's really gonna hate me
I better call her now
Oh look, a bakery!
(Mmm, yummy, yummy cupcakes)
This really isn't good
I need to get her a gift
Oh, perfect, I can get her one right there!
(At the Home Depot, trying to get some wood)
Thirty minutes late
My chances aren't great
[?] if she wants
After I fight in this battle
(Fighting, fighting, in a battle, blowing people's heads off)
I'm putting my foot down right now!
(Need to look at these puppies before I go on my date)
Forty minutes late
(Ooh, lemonade)
No more pit stops
I gotta make it, oh
(Back to fighting in the battle, Molotov co*ktails for everyone)
Putting the key in
(After I get some rest)
Gotta step on the gas
(After I buy my Snuggie)
Total concentration
(Ice cream)
I'm almost there
(More cupcakes)
Now I'm at her house!
Ooh, Charlie Puth, you dumba**
You showed up three hours late
She couldn't wait anymore
[Phone rings, playing "I'm So Hot"]
Yeah sure, I'll pick you up right now
Charlie the dumba** slept through his alarm
Then stalked his friends on Facebook
And then went to an office party
He doesn't even work in an office