Tom:
(Hi, this is Tom, and God knows I'm not perfect. I guess I can be difficult and maybe a little demanding; oh, sure, some might say tyrannical. But I don't get it; I try to be a nice guy, but it seems everybody's pissed at me.)
My friends are pissed
My partner's pissed
My mother's pissed
My lawyer's pissed
My waiter's pissed
My dog is pissed
Everybody's pissed at me!
My banker's pissed
My family's pissed
My plumber's pissed
My fish are pissed
My barber's pissed
My brother's pissed
Chorus:
This is very plain to see
Tom:
Everybody's pissed at me!
Chorus:
I think we can all agree
Tom:
Everybody's pissed at me!
Chorus:
Tom, you are an evil ba*tard
We're all pissed at you today
Tom:
I am sick of all your b**hing
Here's a check, go away
Chorus:
Your boss is pissed
Your kids are pissed
Your neighbor's pissed
Your sister's pissed
We'll bet even God is pissed
Tom:
Everybody's pissed at me!
When I wrote my pissed off list
I'm sure there's someone that I missed
And that will probably make them pissed
Chorus:
It is very plain to see
Tom:
Everybody's pissed at me!
Chorus:
I think we can all agree
Tom:
Everybody's pissed at me!
Chorus:
Very justifiably
Tom:
Everybody's pissed at me!
Chorus:
Your friends are pissed
Your partner's pissed
Your mother's pissed
Your lawyer's pissed
Your waiter's pissed
Your dog is pissed
Tom:
Everybody's pissed at me!