I feel a pain running down my spine, feels like I'm sitting on a porkupine
A hand full of grapes hangin' from my a** please doctor make it pa**
I got a haemorrhoid rock
Please doctor give me a shot I'm going crazy from that haemorrhoid rock
Whenever I want to go sit and stare I cry out loud 'cause I can't bare
This awful pain coming from below I'm gotta cut it away 'cause it hurts me so
I can't sleep or ride a bike I feel like I'm sitting on a great big spike
A million of needles right in my a** please doctor make me pa**