[Verse 1]
The bartender's working on a late night shift
She is bonka blonds and Bon aims on a midnight drift
And the dance band's playing the same old slam
I am sinking whiskey and you are sipping fine wine
I don't know what it is you are trying to prove
Well it should be you but it is me who can hardly move
And I have got my reputation lying on the line
Come on baby, be a good dog and help the blind
[Bridge]
Won't you carry me home
(Like a truck, pick me up)
[Verse 2]
You are not no lady but you have sure got taste in men
That head of yours has got you by time and time again
My arms and legs are aching and my head's about to blow
And your back's been breaking and I'd hate to spoil the show
But I have just spent next weeks wages and I am right out of coin
But you want more and it's half past four and they want to close the joint
But we can't afford a taxi, and it's too late for the bus
But I have been told by friends of mine you are someone I can trust
[Chorus]
Carry me home
Won't you carry me home
Carry me home
[Verse 3]
You drank all your booze and half of mine
I am bleary eyed and you are waiting for the sunshine (to come and k** me)
Just like the man who threw me on the floor
Don't matter, while I am down here I might as well try and find the f**ing door
Excuse me, have you seen it? It is about this big
And have you got a plastic bag because I am going to be sick
I am dead drunk and heaven hanging upside down
And you are getting up and leaving, you think I am going to drown
[Chorus]