[PSEUDOLUS] Lovers divided Get co-incided Something for everyone [HERO & PHILIA] A comedy tonight! [PSEUDOLUS] Father and mother Get one another [DOMINA] Something for everyone [SENEX] A tragedy tonight! [MILES] I get the twins, they get the best [ERRONIUS] I get a family [HYSTERIUM] I get a rest [SOLDIERS] We get a few girls [LYCUS] I get some new girls [PSEUDOLUS] I get the thing I want to be: Free! [ALL] Free! Free! Free! Free! Free! Nothing for kings, nothing for crowns Something for the lovers, liars and clowns! What is the moral? Must be a moral Here is the moral, wrong or right: [PSEUDOLUS] Morals tomorrow! [ALL] Comedy, comedy, comedy, comedy, comedy Comedy, comedy, comedy, comedy tonight!