Yasiin Bey - Soldier's Dream lyrics

[Intro] I'm not gon sing a song or nothing Um, what is that term, they call it... post-traumatic stress syndrome? That thing that uh, soldiers will get. I think a lot of people get that It's like when you experience something and uh, it affects you for a long time afterwards I guess everything works that way. Certain things have more impact than others Sometimes it visits you in your dreams or when you're quiet or just at peace or trying to be at peace A lot of soldiers get it. A lot of common people get it Most of the time common people are soldiers, that's just the way it works out This is a soldier's dream [Verse 1] The other night I was tumbling towards an uneasy sleep Where I had discovered myself Atop the sweet sticky firmament of my dreams Daybreak came and discovered me With my fantasies pasted to my face I can't look at you right now "Show me your eyes," she says "Later," he says "Now, now." "NO!" Shame is a prison you know Yeah, well discretion is a fortress You're staring and looking too closely There's so much about me that I hide That careful eyes will recognize If you look closely you'll notice That the pattern on this soft broadcloth shirt Is made of Working man's blood And praying folk's tears If you look closer, you'll notice that This pattern resembles Tenement row houses, project highrises Cell block tiers Discontinued stretches of elevated train tracks Slave ship gullies, acres of tombstones If you look closer, you'll notice That this fabric has been carefully blended With an advanced new age polymer (oh man, that's nice) To make the fabric lightweight Weatherproof, and durable All this To give some sort of posture and dignity To a broken body that is a host for scars I am the new landmark I am the museum of injury Soldiers visit me and admire me quietly Whispering among themselves You're no soldier Your soft bright eyes never have to Survey the battlefield Much less its collected relics of which, I am one So, my flesh bullet-ridden remains hidden Underneath these soft fabrics Which I carefully select That stand in for how I used to feel For how I remember feeling For how I dream about feeling For how I feel about you And now your curious fingers want to search Beyond this tender armor I can't look at you right now This is my rifle There are many like it But this one is mine 2x [Verse 2] Your eyes are too careful Collecting it all arranging it all; Surgically, robotically, exactly I can't look at you right now But that doesn't matter because You can look at me and the longer that I don't return your gaze The harder that your gaze Starts to run across my back Like a nervous policeman's hands: Brisk, intent, anxious for discovery If discretion is a fortress Then you're threatening to destroy it By simply Standing at the gates And refusing to leave I can't look at you right now But you can look at me Do you see me?