William Finn - I Swear I Won't Ever Again (Part 1) lyrics

[LADIES] Relax. Relax. Relax. Relax [SWEETHEART, spoken] Relax, Marvin [MARVIN] My wife, my wife It's all so clear: She's sweet And dearly needs me She needs my life (My wife) And I'd give it if I could; That's so frequently the most misunderstood Lazily I love her Crazily I hate her Often I debate her Every other night I'm in the right She's in the right I'm in the wrong She's in the right, dammit We get along But always fight, dammit She always wins, but always cries; And it's me and them (Me and men) Me and whomever I swear I won't ever again My kid, my son He needs a plan In short A man to lead him I'll make it fun- My only son- Daddy hears his boychick talk Daddy wants to be the best guy on the block Mommy says you're funny Show me how you're funny Daddy makes good money That's what daddy's for Him I adore Me he'll despise I ask for more He'd cross his eyes at me Let us explore He'd compromise that we Lie on the floor and fantasize...