Weird Al Yankovic - Generic Blues lyrics

I woke up this morning, then I went back to bed Said I woke up this morning, then I went right back to bed Got a funny kind of feelin' like I got broken gla** in my underwear And a herd of wild pigs is trying to chew off my head You know what I'm sayin' Well, I ain't got not money, I'm just walkin' down the road Said I ain't got no money, honey So I'm just walking down this lonely, old road Well, I wish I could get me some money But I forgot my automated teller code I was born in a paper sack in the bottom of a sewer I had to eat dirt clods for breakfast, my family was so poor My daddy was a waitress, my mama sold bathroom tiles My brothers and sisters all hated me cause I was an only child I got the blues so bad, kinda wish I was dead Maybe I'll blow my brains out, mama Or maybe I'll, yeah, maybe I'll just go bowlin' instead I'm just a no good, scum s**ing, nose picking, boot licking Sniveling, groveling, worthless hunk of slime Nothing but a low down, beer bellied, bone headed, pigeon toed Turkey necked, weasel faced, worthless hunk of slime I guess I got a pretty low self image Maybe it's a chemical imbalance or something I should probably go and see a doctor about it when I've got the time Make it talk Oh, make it talk, son, make it talk OK, now make it shut up Plagues and famine and pestilence always seem to get me down I always feel so miserable whenever I'm around I wish somebody would come along, stick a pitchfork through my brain I'd flush myself right down the toilet, but I'd just clog up the drain I got the blues so bad, kinda wish I was dead Maybe I'll blow my brains out, mama Or maybe I'll go bowlin', or I just might go bowling Maybe I'll just rent some shoes and go bowling Maybe I'll join a league, enter a tournament Put on a stupid looking shirt and go bowling instead, yeah