Twiztid - Santa's a Fat b**h lyrics

Sleigh bells jingle-ling rin jing jingle-ling Horses, horses, horses, horses Sleigh bells jingle-ling ring jing jingle-ling (gunshot) Santa Claus s** my balls Drunk as hell rinking bells at the malls Dancer, Prancer, Vixen, and Cupid I'm a get stupid, ha ha ha, eh I sat around all night under the chimney Holdin my sack like "gimme gimme" I know that he's commin, he's commin he must Lookin up nuthin but rust, dust Turn on my tv the very next day I see your gettin payed Leadin the parade I'm that sniper on the buildin Listen to my nine go click, Santas a fat b**h Santa Claus is a fat b**h (Santa Claus is a fat fat b**h) Another year and I ain't get sh** (Another year I ain't get sh**) If I hear him land on my roof (Ohh my undertaker) I'm a bust your a** in the too-hoo-hoo-hoo-hooth Yeah I got somthin to say about St. Nick f** that ho he never brought jack sh** No toys, candy canes, just a lump of coal So I eat it, cuz there ain't nuttin in the cupboards So I'll be quick, quick and brief Alls I need for Christmas is my two front teeth I got my teeth, kicked out my mouth I need a few new ones could you help me out Should've known I guessed I'd show not a steak No kind of gift I didn't get sh** Some say I was bad but that wasn't it It's all because, Santas a fat b**h Santa Claus is a fat b**h (Santa f** you 'cause you're a ho) Another year and I ain't got sh** (Another year I ain't get sh**) If I hear him land on my roof I'm a bust your a** in the too-hoo-hoo-hoo-hooth "Oh-ho-ho don't go that way Rudolph! Thats the ghetto! Ho-ho, those boys and girls don't deserve anything." Santa Claus, Santa Claus where you been? I see you got cookies and milk on your chin I guess you had time to collect your ends You always been down for your rich friend But Rudolph, he don't bring his sleigh my way Nothing but dirt and coal for little J I guess you couldn't fit down my chimmney shaft You need to lose some of that fat a**, eh All the little rich boys they gettin paid Counting the toys and duckets they made Me? I got a little half little chunk of dog sh** I'm a k** that fat b**h Santa Claus is a fat b**h (He ate too much McDonald's) Another year and I ain't get sh** (Mrs. Claus is a ho) If I hear him land on my roof (Slice that b**h in the big red coat) I'm a bust your a** in the too-hoo-hoo-hoo-hooth For the neighborhood Christmas and everythings whack Not a creature stirring but a f**ing rat I ain't hearin jingle bells I ain't hearin nuttin Ain't smelling no turky sure as hell ain't no stuffing All that I paid, wished and prayed That fat motherf**er would swing my way Drop off soldiers and rubber balls But I woke up and found some crusty old drawers Just as I knew it shaft again, and again, and again, and again Every year I wake up to the same old sh**....house There be no sign of the fat b**h Santa Claus is a fat b**h (Santa Claus is a fat b**h) Another year and I ain't get sh** (Another year I ain't get sh**) If I hear him land on my roof (If I hear him land on my roof) I'm a bust your a** in the too-hoo-hoo-hoo-hooth Santa Claus is a fat b**h (Santa Claus is a fat b**h) Another year and I ain't get sh** (I ain't ge-et shi-it) If I hear him land on my roof (Ro-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoof) I'm a bust your a** in the too-hoo-hoo-hoo-hooth (record scratching) "He's got a fuzzy white beard and a great big smile A bright red hat you can see for a mile A bag full of goodies and a great big grin Here comes Santa Claus again."