It's a happy old life being a smurf We dont have a worry or care on the earth We love all of the sights and the sounds and the smells except for that dirty old Gargamel Now the only imbalance I see in smurf land is there's only one female from west to the east (Lady Smurf) Everyone's had her except Papa Smurf Cos he's training to be a Catholic Priest But Lady Smurf has decided to charge She's so in demand that she's charging a fee She's so busy f**ing there's no time for me Well I buff the floors of Smurf land you see and they never made a figurine out of me Im just Floor Buffer Smurf I'm on-one in her eyes So she's been hanging out with those popular guys And theres so many smurf they sell at BP She loves all the others so why not me There's King Smurf and Skate Smurf and Ma**ive co*k Smurf (which strangley they never made a figure out of but i could understand why she'd want to hang out with him) But Lady Smurf has decided to charge She's so in demand that she's charging a fee She's so busy f**ing there's no time for me (Excuse me how much for a Smurf job That'll be eight Smurfs Now do you want me to Smurf you while I Smurf you Actually no I just want you to Smurf me off) Well my name finally made it to the top of her list But I was out buffing some floors that day My housemates name matched with the one on her list so she went to Smurf him but he was gay Shaggy! But Lady Smurf has decided to charge She's so in demand that she's charging a fee She's so busy shagging, there's no time for me