I had the best of intentions Back on Columbus Street. I was searching for the pure of heart, It seemed easy on late-night TV. I needed some company To soothe a heart so scarred. A little lovin’ conversation But first, the numbers on my credit card… Her name was Nasty, My name was John. I said treat me nicely, Nasty, And tell me what you have on. I don’t have all night long To get to the bottom of this. So treat me nicely, Nasty, Send a long-distance kiss. She was so beautiful And I was a handsome guy. We talked until I reached my limit, So glad she couldn’t see me cry Her name was Nasty, My name was John. I said treat me nicely, Nasty, And tell me what you have on. I don’t have all night long To get to the bottom of this. So treat me nicely, Nasty, Send a long-distance kiss. Her name was Nasty, My name was John. I said treat me nicely, Nasty, And tell me what you have on.