Thomas Z. Shepard - The Ladies Who Lunch lyrics

[JOANNE] Here's to the ladies who lunch-- Everybody laugh Lounging in their caftans And planning a brunch On their own behalf Off to the gym Then to a fitting Claiming they're fat And looking grim 'Cause they've been sitting Choosing a hat Does anyone still wear a hat? I'll drink to that And here's to the girls who play smart-- Aren't they a gas? Rushing to their cla**es in optical art, Wishing it would pa**. Another long exhausting day Another thousand dollars, A matinee, a Pinter play Perhaps a piece of Mahler's. I'll drink to that And one for Mahler! And here's to the girls who play wife-- Aren't they too much? Keeping house but clutching a copy of LIFE Just to keep in touch The ones who follow the rules And meet themselves at the schools Too busy to know that they're fools Aren't they a gem? I'll drink to them! Let's all drink to them! And here's to the girls who just watch-- Aren't they the best? When they get depressed It's a bottle of Scotch Plus a little jest Another chance to disapprove Another brilliant zinger Another reason not to move Another vodka stinger. Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhh! I'll drink to that So here's to the girls on the go-- Everybody tries Look into their eyes And you'll see what they know: Everybody dies A toast to that invincible bunch The dinosaurs surviving the crunch. Let's hear it for the ladies who lunch-- Everybody rise! Rise! Rise! Rise! Rise! Rise! Rise! Rise! Rise! Rise!