The Rohan Theatre Band - Nobody Buried The Undertaker lyrics

I've wandered this churchyard for over a lifetime, Each one of these stones is my friend, I remember the day I sent each one away, With a kiss and a penny to spend. There's Mr McPherson who died for no reason, He was buried with his favourite teddy bear. And Jonathon Walton the rector from Bolton, Who died wearing ladies underwear. And everyone turned out for Amy Caruthers, Her coffin was filled with letters from lovers. And Old Nik the pick, with his favourite stick, That he used to beat dogs in the street. And dear Legless Jake, who drowned in the lake, And was buried with 2 spare sets of feet. But nobody buried the undertaker, His body was left in the sun, For no one round here would call him a friend, Everyone knew what he'd done, Everyone knew what he'd done. Lazy-day Jason who died at the racing, Was buried with a toothpick and his trusty pocket-knife. And Old Drunken Charlie was buried with a bottle, And Old Faithful Jake was buried with his wife. And Every-day Jimi had said he would k** her, And in the end we all know who did, She was buried alone with her face to the ground, And a photograph of her 3 kids. And Rosie had never made love to a man, Till her step-father had his evil way, But he knew she would never remember a thing, As she died earlier on that day. And Elephant Gerald, the fat guy from Rugby, We put him in upright and hammered him . But nobody buried the undertaker, His body was left out in the sun, For no one round here would call him a friend, Everyone knew what he'd done, Everyone knew what he'd done.