The Macc Lads - Lucy Lastic lyrics

Well, in this life there's a couple of certs, One is d**h and the other's a nurse, Well Lucy's old and they say she's pa**ed it, But I gave her one and her tits were that big, And they said bollocks and they're made of plastic, And that I never touched her, That's just bagsh**. Lucy Lastic, we shagged everywhere, On the washer in the kitchen and twice on the stairs, Did you f**? You're making it up. Well I got a red pint round the back of our house, Are you sure you want to play with my little red mouse? I found his tail right up Lucy Lastic, The Russians are coming, this is drastic. So I closed the curtains and I sat on her belly, There was dogfood in her clevage, forgot about torn welly. Lucy Lastic's got a great back, Two pounds of tripe just to take up the slack. Was there f**, you're making it up. Lucy Lastic we shagged in a skip. Dead cats in her knickers, tea bags on her tits. We did it in a snowdrift in Wilderclough, But Lucy Lastic was loose enough, Lucy Lastic were loose enough, Lucy Lastic were loose enough, Lucy Lastic were loose enough.