The Macc Lads - Got to Be Gordon's lyrics

Poof at the clinic - he's got the gay plague: 'Help me doctor, my bum's in pain.' 'Get down Kwok Lai's for a 45, eight tandooris and a chicken pie, Ten pints of Guinness and a vindaloo, box of All Bran and a bowl of prunes Dash to the bog and lock the door- Then you'll know what your arsehole's for.' Don't be a poof or a queer brown hatter A turd burglar or a bu*tock basher Eat chips n gravy and cod in batter You'll be safe from the botty slappers MPs down South eat caviar (Smells as fishy as a poofter's fart) She says we eat s*** if we live up North (She needs a gobful of Macc Lad's pork) 'Chips and gravy make you spotty' (They're the ones with the dead sore bottys) If you want to be a Macc Lad and not get AIDs Its got to be Gordon's takeaway.