Oh, oh, oh-woh-oh Oh, oh, oh-woh-oh Is that a three-dollar bill just lying in the street? No, there's no such thing Is that a rainbow shining through the storm I see? No, there's no such thing Is that the face of the Lord in the wood of a door? No, there's no such thing Is that a toad in the stone two million years old? No, there's no such thing There's no such thing No such thing Well the blade in the pit is dangling by a thread There's a buzzard in my bed plus the bone in my leg The dogs are barking at the voices in my head When will they learn There's no such thing? Is that good news ringing on the party line? No, there's no such thing The rapture divine from the kingdom of nigh? No, there's no such thing Is it a free giveaway of a black Cadillac? No, there's no such thing The tooth fairy wanting all his money back? No, there's no such thing There's no such thing No such thing Well believe it if you want it don't matter to me You paint the tree trunks wide on the dead oak tree Your shaffleboards are squeaking every step of the way When will you learn There's no such thing? Oh, oh, oh-woh-oh Oh, oh, oh-woh-oh Is that a bluebird singing in the canopy? No, there's no such thing The last ray of hope beatin' down on me? No, there's no such thing Is it an old-fashioned girl with the dark raven curl? No, there's no such thing The sweet, silent song of a long-lost world? No, there's no such thing There's no such thing No such thing Well the core of the earth is a heart full of hate I might have a soul but it ain't got a mate So just water my weeds, decoration day I guess I never learned Well, there's no such thing Well, there's no such thing Well, there's no such thing No such thing Well, there's no such thing Oh, oh, oh-woh-oh Oh, oh, oh-woh-oh Oh, oh, oh-woh-oh Oh, oh, oh-woh-oh