He stood and looked upon the earth his weapons in his hand His eyesight came to rest upon an ancient little man Tilling the soil and casting nets his flock and herds to tend yet ready at a moment's call his homeland to defend He walked into the other's land an uninvited guest He said I'm here to rid you of a menace and a pest He said I'll build an army base right here upon your shores And I'll protect you from your sons and from the guy next door The old man answered with a snap I need no help from you Why, you're the same one that I fought at Diem Bien Phu My sons are out upon the fields their country to regain So why don't you just go back home and save us both some pain? He said Old man, are you insane? Do you know who I am? Why, I'm the policeman of the world and they call me Uncle Sam The old nun took his weapon up and with a real defiant stand he said Yes, I know you and what you'II do But you see, I just don't give a damn He said Where did this little man get the audacity to take a weapon in his hand and speak like that to me? I'll send my helicopters out to hunt the peasant down I'll send my jets and my tanks to burn his villages to the ground The old man looked up at this fool and did not even bat an eye He said Before we would submit you see, we all would rather die But I feel it fair that I should warn you for your sake This here will be the biggest blunder that you'll ever make The bully, now blushing red let out a battle cry The old man just seemed to fade away into the countryside He smiled and said with confidence I've got him on the run But poonji sticks and b**by traps set fire to his buns The old man fought so hard and well that so the story goes he trapped him, a paper tiger and filled his hide with holes And as the pain intensified he cried out loud and clear If I could just get untangled, y'all I'm gettin' on out of here You see, I just could not win against Ho Chi Minh No, I just could not win against Ho Chi Minh