[Chorus] I used to be a thug but now I'm a believer I used to be a thug I know how it feels I used to be a thug but now a believer No more thug and no more deals Ok doc my occupation was thuggin' The whole nine, I mean the robbin' the dealin' the muggin' The Clubin' the premarital lovin' The type to put one in the oven but I wasn't tryin' to be the husband Sin was Lord and I always obeyed the Master It told me "sell d**" just to get the paper faster Let me go to church but would let me imitate the pastor It only let me imitate my favorite rapper So the deal was I grew up doin' the ill stuff Would fight the cops 'til they threw on the steal cuffs Go in do my bid like the mack When it was done say, "cool out kids---I'll be back." But lately there's been some friction I've been feeling sort of sick from this heart condition It's an unusual affliction, when I do wrong that's when it kicks in (From your description, you know it sounds like conviction) I knew something was going wrong when I bumped in To a kid so soft I thought his name should be Pumpkin Recognizing he was a weaker type of creature I decided to take his beeper and his sneakers You could tell for this kid a fight was a rare sport Cause with ease I held him up like flights at an airport He pleaded, "Don't take my beeper, I need it And, "...not my sneaks, let me keep my brand new Adidas That's when signs of the sickness manifested My mind said, "Be nice and do what the man suggested." I broke down like a fraction Gave him back what I took away like subtraction I'm puzzled and I'm struggling through this distraction The reciprocal of my typical reaction, dag blast him! I made tracks and then a flash back happened That's when the rugged me kicked back in [Chorus] Now last week I was in my dad's black jeep Rollin' mad deep with mad peeps smashed in the back seat We took a back street, a Pontiac tried to pa** me I sped up and made him crash by the trash heap The accident was nasty if you ask me I would have laughed but then it happened again The sickness hara**ed me Oh no, not again. I had hurt a lot of men But never felt bad before even when I shot a friend For ease I thought I should step to the weed spot Cause I was loosing my cool like melted freeze pops My knees knocked as my conscience eaves dropped Found a weak spot And said, "You sin too much, please stop!" Peep the situation as it gets deeper I started getting second thoughts about getting' the reefer But what scared me was the internal reasoning It was, God sees you man, and your not pleasing Him" This was hard to swallow like food with out seasonin' Me believe in Him, I rather not breath again Before receivin' Him You would see a turtle beat a rabbit and a cheetah in the 100m's friend That's all that was the last straw I was ready to blast off To a place I didn't have enough cash for But with the swiftness, the sickness turned up the pitch And with the quickness I felt it clutch me like a stick shift [Chorus] Yea you have no idea just how absurd it is But check the word of this witness, now get this, I heard of this Crew that could rip rhymes murderously, but I heard it would be Christian, I thought absurd as can be And churches to me can make the hard rocks feel nervous But I went because I heard this would be an outdoor service I got there and saw mad youth noddin' to mad truth Rockin' mad hats and suits and not plaid suits As truth crashed through my heart ached like a bad tooth This hard rock got softer than brown spots on bad fruit I came with a heart stone like a statue then the rap group Got under my skin like a tattoo The rapped about a man diein' and I was cryin' They said He died so I could be saved like Private Ryan We all could see zoomorphically He's a lion Coming to rule from Zion with a scepter of iron Trying to hold back tears that wanted to flow jack Couldn't control that, it felt like my soul cracked In half and Jesus started lookin' much bigger than d** pullin' a trigger And it was a first that I ever felt so cursed next to One so perfect My soul thirsted to worship Scufflin', tustlin', my feathers, He ruffled them I tried to duck Him and tried to get back to my hustlin' I must have been affected more than I could have imagined Cause that's been all I can think about since it happened