When I was a child the world was very very big and very strange Now nothing seems to have changed since I was a child Nervous, shy and insecure I stumbled into adulthood and it hurt It hurt so very much, more than I could feel But mother didn't want me so she gave me to my sister like a toy A frightened little boy, big sister's little toy But my eldest sister was the apple of my father's eye she did no wrong With her I did belong, she gave all her love to me I could never forgive you, but I'd never forget you I could never forgive you although you did me wrong My sister felt my father's hand, my father's belt you know I never did And in the strangest way they make me feel unloved Catholic school the pain the guilt my story is no different to tell Every young man's hell there just waiting for the bell And confidence came fleetingly and left as soon the same way that it came Slowly out the way and left me deep in shame I wish I could love myself and tell myself there's more to life than this I held it my in my hands, I had it in my hands I could never forgive you, I could never forget you I could never forgive you although you did me wrong My parents said I wasn't planned, nine and eleven years between sisters and me They nearly gave me away, I think they did too, anyway I never thought I would forgive (__________) They put her in a cage, I was seven years of age And it could never be this when she let me stay up late she let me stay She cuddled me and said "You'll be too big for this one day." "You'll be too big for this one day." Everything she touches turns to gold May I be so bold, let me know just how it feels May I be so bold, let me know just how it feels Everything she touches turns to gold May I be so bold, let me know just how it feels