Sur5ILL - Job Search lyrics

[Verse 1] (OK) I log in in to Monster, my username is my email Sur5illmusic@gmail; a bunch of bullsh** matches at retail Psh--been there, done that...and others asking for Lead Sales Monster is bullsh**ting, I think I'll map out the Indeed trail I try clearing the, search history I applied for my area "Sorry, no rapper jobs were found that match up the criteria" I'm not getting gigs via Soundcloud or my Reverb Sur is bounced out of those keywords...I found out through my research I need a good kick in the a**, a roundhouse for my rebirth So I can make enough dough to buy a townhouse for my niece first But I keep stumbling on wack a** jobs all of them offer the least perks And I need to buy out my lease because my roommate is an obese jerk Maybe I'll wait tables just to stay stable If I'm lucky I'll be dating a patron or fel**ted by a waitress Who has aimed way low and therefore should remain faithful I'll be grateful if I am able to finagle A steady job paying by this April I hope this f**ing label Calls back or I'll end up managing at Staples I don't even need a BA degree to grace this vacancy Which is OK for me This is my fall back if I get a call back So I can fill your pencil and eraser needs Basically I'm certain that this is the career version of free agency As a result I speed hastily to the MacBook Pro to see what awaits for me There seems to be a decent job opening in Scranton, PA selling paper reams I'll gladly drive down and interview with the boss M. Scott if they pay for me Or take a plane to the British branch, get my pa**port image stamped; Ricky Gervais and team They can plan a raise for me Unless they get caught up in a lame tax evasion scheme Man, I'm Gen Y and I've been nice; taking breaths away since Berlin tried And I'm hotter than some cayenne spice; but it's much to my chagrin why Do I even want a regular nine to five like the kinds of guys On 'Mad Men' whom I despise Whose companies have been privatized? I dunno--it seems a giant lie All of my dress shirts are wrinkled because my iron died To be honest, I can't even tie a tie; So if I wear a clip-on to an interview with slacks There's no f**ing way I'll get hired by A quiet guy who is boring And has worked at JP Morgan in a prior life But he was fired twice-- I'll just go against the grain like wild rice (WORK)