Sudden d**h - Kicked in the Balls lyrics

{*a parody of Wyclef Jean's song "We're Trying to Stay Alive"*} Kicked in the balls! Looki-looki-lookin' sharp on a Saturday night Hangin' out with my friends at a club and everything is alright Pickin' up a hot lady is the plan With a skirt short enough to wear as a headband I step to a girl and I make my moves Then I step right back with a nice fresh bruise I found another woman lightin' up the place She took one look at me and then slapped my face But worst of 'em all was a woman named Louise Who channeled all her power to a point on her knees She hit me so hard that I felt time freeze And I thought that my nuts were gonna split like peas I can not describe all the pain I had inside Prayin' for a quick d**h, let me take a breath (inhale) Someone run Get on the phone and call 911 I do more than write rhymes I don't step out of line I like to take a lady out and show her a good time Every minute planned out nothin' can go wrong And I don't put my hands where they don't belong A girl better know that she's lucky to be With a guy like me 'cause I'm the best you see I'm one of a kind, what can I say, I'm great And no woman of mine better ever gain weight Right about then it's time to say goodbye And I get these weird looks from her I don't know why And instead of a kiss I get a hell of a kick And I get all shrivelled up where I should be thick I'm quite surprised by my sudden condition Hunched over on the ground in the fetal position Kicked in the balls! Well you can tell by the way I hold my nuts I'm in lots of pain, I might bust a gut Crawlin' on the floor tryin' hard to inhale Hope my vision comes back because I don't know braille I got a bad feeling that I ruined my clothes And I hope my stomach don't come out my nose If I make it to the door then I stand a chance Gotta find some ice to put down my pants I don't understand why this happened to me I just asked if she was Debbie from this movie I seen Yo, I slip up, slip up, then she kick up, kick up And I throw up, throw up, and now I'm coughin' up blood Then I hiccup, hiccup, try to shut up, shut up And I pick up, pick up myself and die on the rug Hey yo Spice is cryin', I think he's dyin' I don't think he can breathe but he's tryin' That's what he got and he got it good Hit right there where he stood In the balls, yo! Kicked in the balls! Aaah, aaah, aaah, aaah Kicked in the balls! Kicked in the balls!