Sudden d**h - Alien Probes lyrics

{*a parody of Ludacris' song "Area Codes"*} [Chorus] I got probed! I got probed... Aboard a UFO (U-F) UFO (Oh!) Probed, proohhhhbed.. Aboard a UFO (U-F) UFO (Oh!) [Verse One: Tom Rockwell - Sudden d**h] Now you thought it was just on TV, and on the big screen It's worldwide, biggest problem that I've ever seen It's the intergalactic dog catcher Bug eyed extra-terrestrial master with a diminutive stature +Men in Black+, cut up cows I got crop circles formin out behind my house 9:01, Thursday night was a real hoot I was dragged out of bed like a dead prostitute I was brought aboard ship, looked like a Ford truck Stripped down to my drawers, what a run of poor luck Big gray heads, big black eyes "Uh, what's goin on? What's up guys?" They came at me with a mallet and a big syringe And a pointy thing that would make a dentist cringe Metal prongs, big round gears They just jammed the thing into my ears [Chorus] [Verse Two: Tom Rockwell - Sudden d**h] Now every night they pick me up again Just to do a Roto Rooter on my rear end, leavin me in pain again I'm all scarred up, I'm missin teeth 9-1-1 thinks I'm a freak They shove 'em up my nose, they shove 'em in my bu*t And this corkscrew device gets shoved in my belly bu*ton 3 days straight, 2 long probes Shoved in places nothin should go They drill holes in my head, and later on I always wake up back in my bed, and they're gone Why do they always pick on people from the South What do they learn by shoving a big plunger in my mouth Man, after a night of being prodded and poked I just feel like a guy who had a ma**ive stroke I got alien troubles out back And I don't mean the type that we can send back [Interlude] Is it cause they like my trailer park (trailer park) Is it cause they like my beauty marks (beauty marks) Is it cause they like my handsome face (handsome face) Is it cause they like the way I taste (way I taste) Wherever I go, they find me and they just won't let me be They want me to pee, don't rush me just relax and it'll flow free Whenever I call, the Enquirer to my house so they can see You know that they all, stop comin so nobody will believe me [Chorus] [Outro] Hey, what's that big light in the sky? Oh, come on - not again, guys I just got my nose working again Well at least let me bring a camera this time C'mon guys, please J-just leave me alone for a while