(Intro: Lord Diamonds) Come on now Bryan this isn't 'The Sword in the Stone' Tell me which suit should I wear when I meet him: The dark or the light Harris tweed? I need to know precisely (Verse 1: Lord Diamonds) Dressed to pop a lot Top of the charts yes I top a lot I'll never stop until this king's up in Camelot I'm rapping hot, showing up all the king's men Like Big Ben We're swinging those swords that are mightier than pens: a Top 10 We're sending in hits like MI6 I'm getting my kicks by licking the pot pourri off of white chicks I'm waiting hopingly, openly for the right mix I've got the Pope and me ropin' so that the night sticks Tight tricks, we're rapping the magic in rap Dressed in polo: elegant with a subtle touch of Hugh Grant I bet you can't like I enchanted the scene I implemented codeine, perhaps we'll share a gla** of Ovaltine The noble Queen deemed my tracks bringin' peoples back I'm bringing sequels back when beanie's on my regal track We're riding saddleback we're riding battle tracks As a matter of fact you stole a page from out of my almanac We pack aristocratal rhymes in these desperate times Dressed to the nines I'll mix in a drink with all my favourite lines Inclined to wash and rinse I'm going to meet the prince Your favourite noble beef Karl When I go to meet Charles (Break) C ("it's payback time for Charles") H ("we're talkin' 'bout Charles") A ("it's payback time for Charles") R ("perfectly blithering, my dear man!") L ("it's payback time for Charles") ES (we're talking about Charles) (Verse 2: Lord Diamonds) Nobody's cooler when you're born to be a royal ruler The crowning j**eller of the Windsor family time's and moolah Like a medulla oblongata, oughta meet the crooner I bought a schooner so the tune I guess is sooner to rule ya So I can meet the man first, they talking coz your plas was perverse They caught you walking with a man purse They try to front like they could make it off the soldier work (?) These chaps are rapping how they could have had a polo shirt They tailor-fitted and pressed so Charles will have envy Impersonate the best so that you're spitting like an old bean I come complete when I swing the mallet with a swagger I'm running the Jeep off a power ballad by Mick Jagger Like cloak and dagger I'll be mixing tracks in Scotland Yard I'm scuttlin' hard when I'm meeting with Prince Charles and y'all When duty calls I'll be mad gorilla acting k**er When booty calls I'll be spending skrilla on Camilla Wrapped in vanilla with production like I'm JJ Dilla This first-born instance will be living like a ducky biller I'm up in the Aston I'm up in the Martin PC and me are where the real talk is (Break) C ("it's payback time for Charles") H (we're talking 'bout Charles) A("it's payback time for Charles") R("Perfectly blithering, my dear man!" that's the boy) L ("it's payback time for Charles" cheers to Big Ears) ES (we're talking bout Charles) (Verse 3: Stroker deLuca) The knight in shining motherf**ing armor in the cut Let's drop a saddle on the high horse and giddy up To gallop on the track with my trusted noble steed Oversee the procedure to get them royalties Royal steez looking hella debonair Acting like I'm Piers Brosnan with a bit of Fred Astaire Calling up the guard giving you my deadest stare So get to stepping like a motherf**ing set of stairs We go to battle and the cavalry come with the cannons King of the castle coz I'm living like Dungeons and Dragons Heavy artillery raps, acts of chivalry Ducks get beheaded and that, that's the guillotine I drop it on them like a dirty beat up in a filthy clurb That's when the bobby caught me pulling out my billy club From Buckingham Palace to British Columbia Down to Santa Monica and that's a hip motherf**er like Charles (Break) C ("it's payback time for Charles") H ("we're talkin' 'bout Charles") A ("it's payback time for Charles") R ("perfectly blithering, my dear man!") L ("it's payback time for Charles") ES (we're talking about Charles) C.H.A.R.L.E.S