([Act One) Move... Move in closer... Move in closer to the... Move in closer to the middle of the frame (Act Two) It was a morning just like any other morning In the Sinai desert, 1200 B. C It glistened, it glowed, it rose from the gold of the children of Israel ...And most of the adults The cash cow! The golden cash cow had a body like the great cows of ancient Egypt And a face like the face of Robert Tilton ...Without the horns And through the centuries is has roamed the earth Like a ravenous bovine Seeking whom it may lick Cash cow! Cash cow! From the valley of the shadow of the outlet mall To customized petwear boutique From the trailer of the fry chef To the palace of the sheik The cash cow lurks The cash cow lurks The cash cow lurks HA HA HA HA... Who loves you, baby? Who'll give you good credit? Who says you'll regret it? Aaa-ooooooo Who loves you, baby? Who'll give you good credit? Who says you'll regret it? Aaa-aaa-aaa-ooooooo I was in love and I needed the money And then I needed more money I was filthy rich and all I wanted was love ...And a little more money Woe to you, proud mortal Secure in your modest digs You think you're immune? You, who couldn't finger said cow in a police line-up with the three little pigs! Cash cow! Master of disguises! Who's gonna change shape at will? Who's the eye on the pyramid on the back of the dollar bill? Who loves power lunchin' from Spago to Sizzler? Who loves you, baby? Who'll give you good credit? Who says you'll regret it? Aaa-ooooooo Who loves you, baby? Who'll give you good credit? Who says you'll regret it? Aaa-aaa-aaa-ooooooo Who loves you, baby? Who'll give you good credit? Who says you'll regret it? Aaa-aaa-aaa-ooooooo Cash cow comin' to get ya Why? Cuz you think this is stupid, don't you? The cash cow will not be mocked! The cash cow's planning a coup! The cash cow chews cud bigger than you! Woe, woe, woe to you Who blow off this warning Perhaps you've already been licked I, too, was hypnotized By those big cow eyes The last time I uttered those three little words "I deserve better!" (Act Three - instrumental)