Stephin Merritt - '75: My Mama Ain't lyrics

My mama ain't no madam Ma**age is all they do Law troubles, sure, she's had 'em Been stopped for speeding too She says she ain't no hippy I guess Beatnik's the word She says the world is trippy Enough, d** are absurd She was an English teacher Her Master's was in Ed But she taught Harriet Beecher Stowe and got fir-ed My mama ain't no loony But she likes joining cults She could've been a Moonie With similar results She gave away her monies And all our furnishings To benefit the bunnies And all sentient beings She flirted once with yoga We stayed on an ashram The guru wore a toga - In Saratoga! We chanted Bhaja govindam My mama ain't no nudist Except around the pool She's a Tibetan Buddhist Like Catholic only cool Now Mama's going Vedanta A similar belief Her friends look more like Santa And much less like Gurdjieff My Mom's a little flaky Believes in everything From auras to zen reiki Except crystal healing She draws the line at crystal healing