Stephen Sondheim - I Am A Terrifying And Imposing Figure...! lyrics

GUITEAU (spoken): Guess who! Did I surprise you? MOORE (spoken): You scared me half to d**h. GUITEAU (spoken): (shouting) I AM A TERRIFYING AND IMPOSING FIGURE! You know, you are a very handsome woman. MOORE (spoken): Thank-you. GUITEAU (spoken): How would you like to be the wife of the Amba**ador to France? MOORE (spoken): That would be nice. GUITEAU (spoken): Come, let me steal a kiss. MOORE (spoken): I don't think so. GUITEAU (spoken): Oh just one little kiss MOORE (spoken): Stop. GUITEAU (spoken): Oh-ho ho! A coat-cat hey! MOORE (spoken): Let go of me. GUITEAU (spoken): (shouting) I WANT A KISS! MOORE (spoken): Are you alright? GUITEAU (spoken): I am more then alright. I am extraordinary. I am to be reckoned with. I am the next Amba**ador to France! CONDUCTOR (spoken): Your train is on track six, Mr. President. GUITEAU (spoken): President Garfield! GARFIELD (spoken): Yes? GUITEAU (spoken): I want to be Amba**ador to France! GARFIELD (spoken): I'm sorry? GUITEAU (spoken): I want to be Amba**ador to France. GARFIELD (spoken): Mad as a hatter...