Stephanie J. Block - Jason's Bar Mitzvah lyrics

JASON Whizzer, hey! Suddenly it all came clear: I said, let's have my bar mitzvah here! MARVIN, TRINA, MENDEL, JASON, CHARLOTTE, CORDELIA Surprise! MARVIN This was Jason's first-rate idea! And I brought the prayer shall MARVIN, TRINA, MENDEL, JASON, CHARLOTTE, CORDELIA Ooo It's Jason's bar mitzvah! MENDEL Don't you move Everything will soon be great Close your eyes While we redecorate CORDELIA I'll unwrap the billion hors d'oeuvres And someone, eat them, please TRINA Photo ALL Ooo It's Jason's bar mitzvah! TRINA Lovely, flowers make things lovely Champagne makes things lovely, too Everything's amiss MENDEL Drink up! Anyone for bubbly? TRINA Probably, it's doubly Useful at a time like this Cheers MENDEL AND WHIZZER Cheers TRINA And aren't things lovely? I feel more helpless than I have in years MARVIN Try this on Mendel, get this in gear WHIZZER Please excuse me If I interfere But I feel that, since I'm the host It's me who should toast him MARVIN, WHIZZER, TRINA, MENDEL, CHARLOTTE, CORDELIA Ooo, ooo WHIZZER To Jason's bar mitzvah! (the men depart to help Jason get ready) CHARLOTTE I notified the nurses Told them please to not intrude CORDELIA I pa**ed around the food And dumped some extra food 'Cause, Lord knows, we've got plenty CHARLOTTE She's cooked for some 200 guests CORDELIA We number not that many Actually..., we're seven CHARLOTTE Maybe it's not dumb The way this whole thing ends The food tastes really yummy TRINA It does CORDELIA Oh, mummy TRINA Lovely CHARLOTTE AND CORDELIA The flowers seem to sparkle The candelabra sets the tone TRINA I must make things CHARLOTTE AND CORDELIA The wine is very soothing TRINA Lovely CHARLOTTE AND CORDELIA Soothes the "something, something" Someone needed soothing TRINA Put everything CHARLOTTE I think, perhaps, I'm overdressed TRINA In its place CORDELIA I think, perhaps, it doesn't matter TRINA Ready for the CORDELIA That you are TRINA Band CHARLOTTE AND CORDELIA Here we are Jason's bar mitzvah looks Like the books Say it should TRINA, CHARLOTTE, AND CORDELIA Cheers TRINA And aren't things lovely? CHARLOTTE AND CORDELIA Everything is lovely TRINA, CHARLOTTE, AND CORDELIA I feel more helpless than I have in years (Whizzer and Mendel enter, followed by Marvin and Jason) MENDEL AND WHIZZER Here he comes MENDEL Dun, dun, dun, dun, dun Fix his tie Trina, try To make him smile more WHIZZER, TRINA, MENDEL, CHARLOTTE, CORDELIA Don't know why But he looks like Marvin MARVIN How did you turn out so great? Who do I thank for the man you've turned into? Kid, do you know How proud I am? If I don't show How proud I am... You hold my dreams Kid, I burst at the seams 'Cause of you MENDEL Son of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob Son of Marvin, Son of Trina, Son of Whizzer, Son of Mendel MARVIN, WHIZZER, TRINA, JASON, CHARLOTTE, CORDELIA And godchild to the lesbians from next door MENDEL Sing Oh, sing Oh, sing JASON Vie-eme-low yea-o-leh Heh-oh-non vi-low Ah-yis-is-ooh ay-ysi-ro-ale Ha-ooh low toe vo-o-meem aboh