Spittzwell - Even More No Homo (Skit) lyrics

[Phone rings] [Jarren Benton] Who the f** is this? Oh f** not this n***a again! Hello [No h*mo guy] Hey man What's good man? Ain't talked to you in a minute [Jarren Benton] What's up man? What's going on? [No h*mo guy] sh**, man... You know now's wife and kids gone for the weekend, man... I got these wrestling tickets Wanted to see if you wanna come with me, bro [Jarren Benton] Naaah... I'ma be... You know what, man? I'ma f**ing be probably be busy as f**, man. (Hey, man! Come on dude!) Got a lot of sh** going on [No h*mo guy] This is The Rock, man! The Rock! The s**iest f**ing wrestler ever, bro! Come on, man! Come on! My n***a, come on, man! You gotta come... But I'm saying... Yo, that hair and the chest and them thighs, man... I'm just saying... No h*mo, bro. Really no h*mo Listen [Jarren Benton] Nah, I'm cool I ain't really into f**ing wrestling like that, my n***a Thanks though, man [No h*mo guy] Look, man... He's gonna be fighting The Undertaker, so they're gonna be slipping on each other I'm just saying, man; it's gonna be a good night, man You know, I come... I slide through Get me? [Jarren Benton] Nah, man. Naaah [No h*mo guy] Look, no h*mo. Really Just the both of us, man [Jarren Benton] Nah, I'm cool, my n***a Thanks though [No h*mo guy] Hey man, listen... What I really want to call you about though... [Jarren Benton] What's up, man? [No h*mo guy] Well, sh** man... I mean, you know... I'm saying... You know... You never call me no more, man What's the deal? [Jarren Benton] I'm just f**ing busy as f**, man Got a lot of sh** going on You know... Like I said, man [No h*mo guy] Hey man... Real talk No h*mo. I've seen them instagram pics sh** man, you looking like you... You look real good right now No h*mo though [Jarren Benton] Look... I've gotta f**ing go, man [No h*mo guy] Hold on, man... I still want to... You know what I'm saying? I mean what, you growing your hair out, bro? I'm just trying to say, man... You look like... You know... Young [?], you know? No h*mo or nothing, man, but I'm just trying to say like... Hey, I don't know how to... I really don't know how to say this, man, but like yo... Ever since that last conversation I think things went kind of a little south, you know? No h*mo, bro, but listen... I've got feelings for you, bro Everybody's been telling me I was gay, but I was like "Nah, I'm not gay, bro. No h*mo. Really. I'm not gay, bro." You know... people like... Hey, you eat that hotdog weird and I'm like "No, I don't, man This is how people eat hotdogs They swallow them like that." Why do people think that that's gay? I don't think that's gay So I don't see... I think you gay for thinking that's gay I mean like yo... No h*mo bro, but I know you've seen them p**ns and all of a sudden it's like three people Two dudes and one girl You like "Hey, that chick's gonna get it Oh wait... Oh oh! They touching!" I mean, if two dicks bump, why is that gay? That ain't gay That's just like two dudes like "Heeey I'm more manly!" That's like a manhood test, you feel me? No h*mo. Definitely no h*mo Two dicks touching; no h*mo, bro Two dicks bumping tip to tip; kinda h*mo, but if side to side and like slapping each other a little bit, you know? You shove them and giggle a little bit... That ain't gay. You just having fun You wrapped up in the moment Bro, come on! No h*mo. Really though. No h*mo. Definitely Listen bro... You know me, bro... We go back, bro. I am no h*mo No, everybody now I ain't gay! Listen... Just cause I kissed that dude one time at the club, everybody like "Oh, he gay!" I ain't gay, man! He kissed me I didn't kiss him! He came up to me when I was drinking and was like"Hey!" and then he kissed me in my sh** What am I supposed to do? Push him off? What the f**? I'm not a dickhead! No h*mo bro, but that dude had some good smelling breath that night and his cologne was off the chain I forgot to ask him what the hell that sh** was though No h*mo, bro. Come on, man! Hello? Hey, you there? Hello? [Intercept message] If you'd like to make a call, please hang up and try again If you need help, then hang up and dial your operator