I'm surrounded by chocolate and those trashy magazines about uninteresting people who pretend to live the dream And I'm bored and I am restless in this shop that's selling me So they've put me back on sale, now it's buy one get one free So who will buy? Who will buy? Who will buy me? Can you a**ure me that you'll always adore me? 'Cause there's no money back guarantee It's the same old story they all look but can't afford me And it seems I'm always sitting slightly out of reach So who will buy? Who will buy? Who will buy me? So won't you save me from myself here on the shelf just getting old Because I'm growing tired of watching everybody else get sold Well I can't promise you nothing 'cept a hand for you to hold And a body to lie next to, warm you up when you are cold So will you buy? Will you buy? Will you buy me?