This one's about how my G.I. Joe came to life And he kicked in my bedroom door last night He grabbed me by my genitals Mad at the fact that he had none of his own G.I. Joe hates humans Yet he longs to be one He envies our power to reproduce I know, I know cuz he tried to k** me Daybreak forced him back into his toy box Where I hurriedly slapped on a padlock With matches and gasoline, I sent him to Hasbro Hell Now I can't trust any toy, not even ones made by Mattel