Smart Alec - I s** at Picking up Women lyrics

A player is not exactly the word to use I'm in the game.---I just usually loose I can't afford RESTAURANT meals for CHICKS ' That's why I primarily date ' ANOREXICS My ex was obese, ' sorry to disappoint Cops kept her at a DUI checkpoint No breathalyzer. ' No walking a line You're drunk driving if you think that broad's fine I'm sorry I offered to blow her I just have low standards, ' I'm sober! I lack GAME, ' not sure what I'm MISSING I couldn't even get raped in PRISON My LONELY TEARS drew PUDDLES I ROOFIED a PROSTITUTE just to CUDDLE Got a vasectomy, Doctor says a waste You already got birth control, your face \\ Chorus \\ I Hung outside confessional booth Where naughty girls tell the truth I thought catholic youths ' are s*uts at least But the only one to hit me was the priest Gave a girl flowers to nail her She's allergic, only blew the inhaler The things I say can be sick The best bl**jobs are from bulimics No gag reflex would ever follow But bulimic skanks. They never swallow About to cum, I can't eject Ipod mode, Don't disconnect Set my GPS to find a wife It's been Rerouting my whole life A rapping j**? I'm not disabled My people own the record label! \\ Chorus \\ I went to a feminist rally to date chicks But it was just f**ing lesbians that hated dicks Offered the radical feminist leader a lick She said "only if I bang you with dil*o stick." That's sick, don't be so quick Let me explain why I'm your pick Yo, I'm not trying to be a prick But you'd let me say the N word if you saw my dick No trick, For a Jew it's nice Rabbi had to circumcised me twice (nightcrawler) I've seen it. Please (nightcrawler) This dude could be Chinese I Went out with a girl for a martini I went to the bathroom, saw some graffiti Call for a good time on the urinal cup I dialed the number. My f**ing date picked up!