Duffey / Macainsh / Macainsh [ .......................................... ] Well every day at the salon you can see him arrive He stood six foot six, he weighed one-o-five He's kinda narrow at the shoulders and narrow in the hips With a curl in his hair and a smile on his lips. That's Bruce (Big Bad Bruce) No-one seemed to know where Bruce came from He kinda swished into town and stayed all alone Never said much, kind o' quiet and shy And when he spoke at all, it was just to say: 'Hi'. Big Bruce (Big Bad Bruce) Then came the day o' that terrible fire Something went wrong in the number five dryer Into the fire with a squeal and a shout We waited an hour, but he never came out. Poor Bruce (Poor old Bruce) Where that salon once stood is a grocery store But his name will live for evermore In the annals of time and in the hall of fame As a gay young cat who went down in flames. Poor Bruce. [ .......................................... ] I'm just a straight in a gay, gay, gay world I'm carryin' the banner tryin' to keep the flag unfurled Well I'm just a straight in a gay, gay, gay place I might look a little odd but I'm part of the human race. Well I'm just a straight in a gay, gay, gay world Might look a little butch but my hair is naturally curled Don't wear no floral shirts or white, buckled shoes No blow jobs or blow waves, I do just what I choose. And if I'm forty-seven and I've never been married That's just a load that's gotta be carried Even if I had my eyebrows plucked That don't mean I'm hangin' round just to get Just 'cos he's happy don't mean that he's gay All his friends seem to take him quite the wrong way There ain't many of us still left alive All my friends have gone over to the other side. I'm just straight in a gay, gay, gay world I'm just straight in a gay, gay, gay world I'm carryin' the banner tryin' to keep the flag unfurled I'm just straight in a gay, gay, gay place I might look a little odd but I'm part of the human race I'm just a straight in a gay, gay, gay world Might look a little butch but my hair is naturally curled Don't wear no floral shirts or white, buckled shoes No blow jobs or blow waves, I do just what I choose And if I'm forty-seven and I've never been married That's just a load that's gotta be carried Even if I had my eyebrows plucked That don't mean I'm hangin' round just to get. Just 'cause he's happy don't mean that he's gay All his friends seem to take him quite the wrong way There ain't many of us still left alive All my friends have gone over to the other side. I'm just straight in a gay, gay, gay world I'm carryin' the banner tryin' to keep the flag unfurled I'm just straight in a gay, gay, gay time And a straight in a gay world is getting hard to find. I'm normal, yes I'm normal I'm normal as anybody can be I'm normal, yes I'm normal There's no one as normal as me. I've had my share of orgys, young marrieds and gay swingers Had too many weirdos, wet nurses and girl singers Seen me enough blue movies to last me a lifetime through And I'm getting pretty desperate for something new to do. So I'm throwing out my rubber sheets and kinky knee high boots Going back to holding hands, that's where I got my roots Throwin' out my dil*os and p**no magazines Goin' back to wholesome s** just like it's in my teens. 'Cause I'm normal, yes I'm normal Normal as anybody can be I'm normal, yes I'm normal There's no one as normal as me. No one ever just says: 'Hi' - or talk about the weather They all ask me if I'm bi and into whips and leather There's just too many ma**age girls doin' it for free And I get that funny feeling, someone's usin' me. So I'm throwin' out my Spanish Fly, all that Vitamin E Swallowed enough stupid pills to start a factory Yes, I'm givin' it all up, I'm going back to zero Getting just too tired of being a p**nographic hero. I'm normal, yes I'm normal Normal as anybody can be I'm normal, yes I'm normal There's no one as normal as me. Is everybody there normal? .................................