Your baby doesn't love you anymore And I your friend have also reconsidered I made her feel far more Hey what are friends for If you need to see either of us Call this unlisted number If you need to see either of us Call first Starvation is not the way to kick Besides you could never make that diet stick So go paint the town red And find yourself a sterile bed But please just don't surprise us And if you find you need a friend You can reach us anytime at all By telephone So did you get our christmas card We hope you had a good one we went abroad We saw the leaning tower I swear man it's about to topple over We saw a statue that reminded us Of you somewhere in Europe And if you feel like stopping by sometime That's alright just give us a ring The light bulb above your head has burned out We hope that doesn't mean you're uninspired All of your bright ideas are Now suffering in the dark She's the tar and I'm the feather in your cap But I'm afraid we're both a bit under the weather right now But if you can think of anything else you might need Feel free to call