People always ask me How do you memorize all of that? And the truth is the first girl I ever kissed, tasted like tomatoes And I know this, because the second girl I ever kissed tasted like pepper It wasn't unpleasant It's just that I was expecting tomatoes When I was a kid I learnt that time slows near a black hole Inside a black hole time stops altogether Whether or not this theory will ever be proved I'm moved to believe this would be the perfect place to love someone In grade 4 my gym teacher gave me the nick name half-ton It was a name that stuck I remember it, because it was the first I ever told someone Go f** yourself! and meant it He quit calling me the name after he called my house Trying to get me in trouble for what I'd said To which my grandmother replied Mr. sh**head, I told him to say it I remember my grandfather's blue tool kit Where he hid a secret stash of raisins I recall thinking: My granddad has the worst taste in candy But he did teach me how to tie a tie My first opportunity to apply this knowledge was my first date A seventh grade cla** mate, who showed up wearing acid washed jeans and a Def Leppard t-shirt I wore a suit and tie When she asked why I was all dressed up I had to think quick and I told her: I thought it would be funny I don't wanna say it ended badly But she wound up leaving me for a boy Who could make farting noises with his arm-pit I'm forced to admit - he was pretty cool In fourth grade my teacher had a rule about speaking out of turn Failure to learn and practice this lesson Would result in having to sit outside I know this, because I've tried it once When she finally came out to check on me, she asked What was so important, that it couldn't wait? Knowing that it's rude to point But needing to illustrate my position I gestured to her chest and said Your b**b is hanging out She quickly covered up and corrected me: Breast She was a good teacher When I was twelve, I was given an academic diagnostics test Later the instructor informed me I had an aptitude for history He looked puzzled when I replied Yeah, but that was yesterday. Today I'm more interested in tomorrow I remember it Because the next day I asked a girl if I could borrow a pen When I offered it back she said You should write me a letter with it first So I did, wrote her a note Which the teacher then intercepted and read to the cla** It was something that we'd learnt in science that day About the way gravity affects ma** and weight In relation to how quickly something will fall Example A crumpled ball of paper will fall at the same speed as a boulder of granite It doesn't matter how much something weighs It stays the same until you consider surface area and resistance At which point the persistence of gravity loses force Example Crumple a piece of paper into a ball It will fall faster than a loose sheet They are both composed of the same ma** and weight So you'd think that the rate of velocity measured with the force of gravity Would cause each to fall at the same speed But that's when you need to consider that the greater surface area of the loose sheet adds resistance So the crumpled ball will fall quickly But the loose sheet will slowly float I wrote a note Explaining that when two people are falling for each other They do so at the same speed There's no need to factor in the physics explanations Or something we can make no use of Einstein said: Gravity won't be held responsible for people falling in love I wrote her a note Telling her: If I fall in love with you No one will ever be able to explain it And I think that's beautiful Despite the cla** laughing, she did as well Which is how I can tell you that I then knew and now still know She tasted like tomatoes I don't remember the way every song goes I can't recall ever person I've met I get names mixed up all the time I'm terrible with birthdays But I remember all the ways people have affected me How our stories became memories And if you were enough then you're in there somewhere Maybe it was a truth or dare kiss Or a simple act of kindness One that reminded me to remember this moment And mark it as a memory , so we could both have it to look back on From this life, I've drawn conclusions so big They can't fit into the tiny comic book boxes Because I don't wanna risk losing the detail Just so I can make the story fit It's not a trick I remember how things felt Which in turn makes me remember how things happened Like my first attempt at skateboarding Where I received a down to the bone skinned knee I remember a tree that looked like a man With huge arms trying to hold up the sky I used to try to climb it to the very top Until one day I didn't, couldn't get down I remember the man with the brown car Tried to convince me he was sent to pick me up by my mom Number 1, I lived with my grandparents Number 2, he didn't know the safety word I recall when it finally occurred to me I'm pretty fantastic It's not magic I remember because I make comparisons Not in terms of better or worse, just different And not all of these memories are great, but they're mine Which lends way to believe That none of our lives are put together on an a**embly line We're not pre-packaged with memories or programmed with stories We have to make our own And they all come batteries not included And with the endless opportunities we have dearly Seldom do we take the time necessary to record, rewind and press play In our own way, we are all ghetto blasters at top volume We consume silence with noise Speakers pounding out our heartbeats as we write refund receipts for the broken ear drums of people who could hear us live We give up our self's time Precious, because its quality is limited only by your ability to live within it Put yourself into every second of every minute And you will have a life worth remembering Just because we don't have forever Doesn't mean we have to live our lives moving towards the end As if on a conveyor belt I felt nothing short of astonished when people asked me How do you memorize all of that? The fact of the matter is It's not a trick There is no thick curtain you need to pull away No little old man making it all work from behind a locked door You yourself probably remember before when I told you that Near a black hole, time slows Inside a black hole is where I wanted to grow tomatoes