Schaffer The Darklord - H-Mail lyrics

[Schaffer the Darklord] Schaffer the Darklord f**ing Schaffer the Darklord I- god I just- I hate that guy so much I'm going to write him a letter and tell him Dear Schaffer the darklord You f**ing s** dude And I can't wait for your little career to end No need to read it back or spell check it f** it, click send go All of my friends They think that Schaffer's so great (so great) Half of them even have him in their top eight (top eight) I anxiously await a date When fate will place us face-to-face To tell that fake how much I hate him But today I'll use Myspace And I'll place lots of comments Up on his page A flame war I will rage hell Fill his box with h-mail Trash his name and bash him All across the internets on every domain Which Google traces back to his name My disdain for this man overflows to his fans It's time I educate these idiots the best that I can They're so amused by his abuse of rap music I'll have to craft a diss track Added just to prove there is nothing to it I'll hit my four foot bong I'll flip my four track on Then I'll rant on and on Until I've written this song I'll dedicate it to him Stewing in my seething hatred Mail it to him, Schaffer I f**ing hate you dude And now you're ruined do it [Chorus: Liisa2Eyes] I hate you Schaffer And it's time I let you know just how much Your music's stupid And your rhymes, your beats Your flows they all s** Who are these people? Do these geeks believe you're evil? That's f**ed You're just a goofy douche bag You could use a good smack up against the head When will you give it up? When will you give it up? [Verse 2: Coolzey] Hey hey star What's up bro? I read your bio I see you're making big moves out there in Ohio Or Idaho man, i don't know whatever Hick bum f** town you must be trapped in Sorry dude, it must s** Anyhow champ, listen up I got some advice About your little rap career If I were you I'd think twice First off you're a fan man And fans can never make it You gotta be a real man in this rap game If you wanna take it I never listen to nobody but my own sh** Nobody rock it like my own boys my own click We all got big dicks and huge shirts and fitted hats You look like a hipster, what kind of sh** is that? You ain't a b-boy Boy rocking a mustache Them brown pants will get your a** whipped real fast There ain't no real graff art up on your profile When I be posing for a picture never no smile You smile way too much Makes you look gay What kind of wack bullsh** did your hook say? You read a book? Yay! You won't get no play Either from the ladies or my iPod there's no way You're a white boy with gay friends And really at the day's end Your street cred is zero out of ten Put down the pen I got this game locked Holla at your boy [Verse 3: Schaffer the Darklord] I know your dying Know your crying on a shoulder Know you read my letter Cause I checked the sent folder It ain't over I've got an arsenal of vitriol To blast at you from twenty two new digs On you and youtube, you Pitifully chicken sh** Insipid dickless idiot You sh**ty spitting Little b**hing sissy quit your hissy fit A hack with a backpack As wack as a fanny pack Your sack of crap act Makes me wanna yak, fact No one likes your trite boring Poorly written white flow Go away tonight Why don't you throw away your mic, so f**ing unfunny dummy You wanna make fun of me? You're nothing but another Eminem and Weird Al wannabe And as a hip-hop-head I defend the culture I say your act is racist, face it Schaffer you're a vulture A dozen thumbs down on ten tracks, do the math I'm your number last fan And at last you'll feel my wrath [Chorus: Liisa2Eyes] I hate you schaffer And it's time I let you know just how much Your music's stupid And your rhymes, your beats Your flows, they all s** Who are these people? Do these geeks believe you're evil? That's f**ed You're just a goofy douche bag You could use a good smack up against the head When will you give it up? When will you give it up So schaffer, hey Since I've shown you the way I'm sure that now your towel will now be thrown in any day No doubt, I'm out now I've covered all I've had to say Later days schaffe - oh, wait P.S., you're gay Pwned!