Threading Rap First I was afraid I was petrified I used depilatory creams And then I'd cry Waxing was painful Bleaching was a sham Tweezing left me red I-I-I look like a man And then a gypsy woman Grabbed me by the hairy hand She showed me to how to thread And now I understand You don't rip You don't pluck You don't bleed You don't burn Burn, Mother Father, Burn (Indian sitar flourish) First you grab a spool of thread And two fingers on each hand Wrap around the thumb and Your index if you can Twist it around Like your doing chinese torture Oh, i foresee some flossing In your future And then you move And then you slide And then you twist And then you wait And it don't Burn, Mother Father, Burn (Indian sitar flourish) So for all the hairy women Who have the unibrow Let's get happy right now And thread that upper frown Cause if your mustache looks Better than your man's You've gotta wrap around the thumb And your index if you can And move, slide, twist and wait It's clean it's mean they look lean 'naw mean And it don't Burn, Mother Father, Burn Aww yeah. 100% cotton y'all