The king of love sits in a field with his head in his hands Says it's alright, in fact it's the way it was planned We don't love his face, we don't love his hands It's his mace, and the things we don't understand The king of love - oh no Drinks white rum, says it's the liquor of kings Phones his mum, "where d'you hide my wig ?" When the fridge opens wide, out jump mungo and madge ... midge No no, no no, no no, i don't need this bridge The king of love - oh no Steeplechase, it's very popular here They set it up to knock down the beer You see them at lunch, all in a bunch year after year But you never see them when the fat lady sings The king of love - oh no The king of love - yeah The king of love - oh no