Rubberbandits - Magic Lump lyrics

[Intro] [f** That] Yeah we're gonna kick some straight Limerick city G Funk [Limerick City G Funk] Cause that's how we do it b**h [That's how we do it -Limerick] I'll tell you a story right now [Yeeaahh, Limerick City] Bout something wrong with me [Oh Yeah] It goes like this [That's how we do it] [Chorus 1] I found a lump in my scrotum I found a lump in my scrotum I found a lump in my scrotum I'm worried ‘bout my bollocks I touch and hold them [Verse 1] I caress them, I bless them, I pray I'm not sick Will this lump move up to the top of my dick And will it get worse before it improves? Oh, Jesus please, don't have my balls removed My cajones, my goolies, my family j**els I can't wear shorts at the swimming pool And if a beour catches sight of my lumpy nads Will she laugh, and point, and tell the lads? [Chorus 2] I found a lump in my scrotum [A lump in his scrotum] A lump in my scrotum [A lump in his scrotum] I found a lump in my scrotum [A lump in his scrotum] So I called round to Dr.Mossy and I showed him [Verse 2] It's a variation of a poor guys spot, and the nurse concurs that's what you've got But there's no need for pills or anesthetic Cause the damage to your sack is merely cosmetic It could be there for a couple of years But have no woes and have no fears Between you and me, and these four walls There's nathing wrong with your lumpy balls [Chorus 3] I got a lump in my scrotum [A lump in his scrotum] A lump in my scrotum [A lump in his scrotum] I got a WICKETY WICKETY lump in my scrotum Yeah A lump in my scrotum [A lump in his scrotum] [Verse 3] So the weeks go by, and the lumps still there It's getting' hard to hide beneath my pubic hair Then late one night, I awoke with a fright Cause my sack started flashing like a traffic light Oh, holy moley am I losing my mind? I swear to god I hear a little voice inside And so I rub the lump And to my surprise There came a puff of smoke from my Jap's eye And as the dust settled What do I see? A big genie lookin' down at me He winks at me, and he stinks of pee, he says “Thank you man, for you have set me free” [Chorus 4] I found a lump in my scrotum [A lump in his scrotum] There's a lump in my scrotum [A lump in his scrotum] A magic lump in my scrotum [A lump in his scrotum] I got a lump in my scrotum [A lump in his scrotum] [Verse 4] So the genie makes an offer I can't refuse “These 3 wishes that I grant to you But choose them wisely, every one Cause wishes made, can't be undone” So I sit up on my bed and I scratched my head “Should I bring back 2Pac from the dead? Do I really need a penis 2 foot long? Or a time machine Or a ma**ive bong?” So I settled on the factors of a happy life A house made of hash and a rapid wife “And your third wish what will it be?” “Uhh- A German Shepherd that can talk to me- ” [Chorus 5] I found a lump in my scrotum [A lump in his scrotum] There's a lump in my scrotum [A lump in his scrotum] Yeah, A magic lump in my scrotum [A lump in his scrotum] Uh, Yeah [Verse 5] You'd imagine I'm a big success But truth be told my life's a f**in' mess- Cause me and that dog had a fallin' out So he told the Guards about my cannabis house They did me for possession with intent for sale Now I spend my days up in Limerick jail And as for my beour, my s**y wife She ran off with that dog who ruined my life So every night I rub my sack In hopes that genie might come back Cause he took my dreams And crushed and broke them And left me NATHING But a lumpy scrotum [Outro] A lump in my scrotum! I found a lump in my scrotum! A cursed lump in my scrotum! An unwanted lump in my scrotum! I hate this lump in my scrotum! This f**ing lump in my scrotum! I rang up my parents and I told them All about this ba*tardin' lumpy scrotum!