Robert William Service - Duello lyrics

A Frenchman and an Englishman Resolved to fight a duel, And hit upon a savage plan, Because their hate was cruel. They each would fire a single shot In room of darkness pitchy, And who was k**ed and who was not Would hang on fingers twitchy. The room was bare and dark as d**h, And each ferocious fighter Could hear his fierce opponent's breath And clutched his pistol tighter. The Gaston fired - the bullet hissed On its destructive mission . . . "Thank God!" said John Bull. "He has missed." The Frenchman cried: "Perdition!" Then silence followed like a spell, And as the Briton sought to Reply he wondered where the hell His Gallic foe had got to. And then he thought: "I'll mercy show, Since Hades is a dire place To send a fellow to - and so I'll blase up through the fireplace." So up the chimney he let fly, Of grace a gallant henchman; When lo! a sudden cry, And down there crashed the Frenchman . . . But if this yard in France you tell, Although its vein be skittish, I think it might be just as well To make your Frenchman - British.