Robert Lund - Re. Your Song About My Client Delilah lyrics

Dear Mr. Higgenson, it's me, Delilah's lawyer I am writing to inform you, there's a 3rd restraining order In effect The first two haven't stopped you yet She's quite upset May I remind you, Tom, my client doesn't like you But you keep composing songs for her which means you have the IQ Of a brick You couldn't "hit that" with a stick Please seek help quick Oh, we're watching you, you creep Oh, we're watching you, you creep Oh, we're watching you, you freak Oh, it's what we do all week All the stupid week Do not address Delilah's mother as a MILF, and Please desist from mailing puppy dogs and photos of yourself In plain white T's And next time, put some pants on, please Nice cottage cheese My client's gone in hiding halfway 'cross the nation But you evidentially stalked her to her undisclosed location In New York You put it in your song, you dork We're freaking torqued Oh, we're watching you, you creep Oh, we watch you when you sleep Oh, we watch you when you eat Oh, we watched you take a leak A thousand miles seems pretty far But you've used planes, trains and cars And pogo sticks, and Segways, and a horse But we've got warrants out for you So Romeo, if you try to Go near her, you'll regret the choice, of course There's lots of guys who'd gladly pay To make your love song go away They'll quickly take you down without remorse With deadly force Dear Mr. Higgenson: This isn't 'cause I'm jealous That I left the band for law school while You got rich with the fellas With your song Here's why I took this client on: Like you, I've wanted her so long So it's so nice to sue you, Tom P.S. How's Mom?