Reks - Bitter lyrics

[Chorus] If you wanna tell me n***a then tell me n***a then tell me I ain't sh** If you wanna judge me n***a then judge me n***a then judge me I ain't sh** If you never loved me Why don't you leave me? Why don't you leave me? I ain't sh** If you wanna hurt me n***a then hurt me You're part of my family I ain't sh** [Verse 1] Lowest position to be is in the dirt man I'm in that position like underneath the earth fam See Jesse birthed Pam and Pam met David And David just couldn't stay, Pam couldn't take it Had to face it in them dirty dark slums Where we barely saw crumbs, wishing things, giving ? But a lonely son stolen from God's hands Only homie get my plans with this dark skin, accepted outcast Got pressured by a** before the adolescence Malnourished, I guess it's a blessing to understand hunger Do other younger kids wonder where their school clothes Handed them Skippies with holes and so my shoes froze I was a bully, a punk, got A's and I flunked He got AIDS, I was shocked but didn't comprehend When momma said we was not infected by his sins Yeah we was on the block but that was innocence [Chorus] [Verse 2] I used to beg for a place to stay, no bed n***a lay down on the floor and just close the eyes No disguise, many knew I was in a bind Sure they tried but this was my mountain to climb Counting time thinking I'm destined to be great See the great comes from nothing, what an obvious fate A day late, one hundred pennies short Smoking Newports on my way to court Like Big he caught for an a**ault, I never did real time or a real crime That's a reason to be proud yet and still I'm feeling like Iron Mike must have felt when he got that facial tattoo Things I say so taboo mad at you displaced anger Smoking, sipping Tanqueray, never met a stranger ? depression we are close like the star and manger Jesus and the angels, I'm a picture painter I ain't sh** but an egotistical ba*tard See a pistol I'll blast it, weak with peer pressure Speak with fear bet ya, thought I had a heart of stone Many years later rectangle box all alone [Chorus] [Verse 3] Late calls, I ain't coming home, studio time, crashing at spots I can see you there just watching the clock (I ain't sh**) If I could think about myself less And focus on the pain I'm causing at home yes But I'm too selfish Worthless and helpless, chosen to be reckless Poisoning myself with nicotine and Hennessy To the ? memory, ask a simple question I'm raising my voice instantly, the Devil is an enemy A liar and a friend to me, keeping em close Is to to Hell that you're sending me? One last toast To the born beggar who cried himself to sleep When Billy ? said men don't weep but I wept and I slept And I woke then I smoked then I drink but I quit And I coke, I'm a hypocrite Pause that sh** for a sec, I need a cigarette I ain't sh**