Phora - Sinner lyrics

[Verse 1] When I speak it's like ya'll don't hear Why I feel like God don't care Why I feel like I ain't good as no one else I'm searching but my pride ain't there I just feel like life ain't fair My boy got shot, died right there But me, I died twice and came back to life So tell me how can I be scared Why do I gotta doubt myself All I ever do is doubt myself Drink liquor till the head gets consumed by the pint, like I don't care about my health Really I'm just trying to numb the pain Love and hate it all just feels the same Won't say I'm affected by the fame But even my momma know I changed So I get drunk till I can't feel The love fake, the pain real Got so many scars it ain't heal But I gotta soul bullets can't k** Why I feel like cops just want to pop me Pop's never had a pot to piss in Probably pack a nine on his hip then sit beside me Pray to God there's no triple six inside me No I can't let the devil in my mind Same time the church will turn you blind Last time I heard a preacher preach a sermon All I heard him say was sinner's going to die And they will never get to see a Heaven With all due respect f** the reverend Cause I know life was doing 25 Praying for early d**h like it's a blessing This for my people going through depression This for the kids who never felt affection This for the kids whose parents don't accept them Saying they love everyone else except them I know what it's like to feel alone I know what it's like to need a home I know what it's like to not know what it's like To have a love you can call your own [Hook] See I done tried every single f**ing drug on that shelf Trust me man it don't help I just feel like I'm losing myself (x5) [Verse 2] Why I feel like love don't last Things change when you move so fast I was trying to focus on us in the future You was focused on my past If you left I would lose my soul Promise me that you won't let go See I just need love it's funny I got all money but my heart still broke So many times I said I'ma change Just to turn around and do the same Same sh** that's been putting you in pain I know I'm the only one to blame So I get drunk, till I can't see I love you, but I hate me Trying to be someone I can't be And I ain't been myself lately Why I feel like I'm the only one that got me You could take the same 45 that shot me Pop the clip in, co*k it back and put that motherf**er to my head, you'll never stop me Yeah I be living life on the edge Suicide all in my head Why the world don't care about no one else's life till they already dead I just wish pops was back to how he was Cause he ain't been the same since the d** And I ain't been the same since he said the worst form of pain is not being loved So we use the d** they gave to us To replace the love the world takes from us Lately I don't even know who to trust They saying even Satan was an angel once So I can't feel sh**, so numb that I can't feel sh** Living just to die, we dying just to live this life it doesn't make no sense [Hook:] See I done tried every single f**ing drug on that shelf Trust me man it don't help I just feel like I'm losing myself (x5)