Philip Melancon - Southern Baptist In New Oleans lyrics

(Spoken) And the Baptists are coming back on into New Orleans. The Southern Baptists came a few years ago, and they had a nice big convention down here, and we were lucky enough to get a copy of their manifesto, and, gosh, we put it to music. Aren't we lucky? And, uh, so here's a rendition of the Southern Baptist manifesto. We don't like the h*mos We don't like the blacks We don't like the wicked, Who tired of playin' craps We don't go for dancin' And we don't read the news And except for that one, We don't like the Jews. As God's chosen people God tells us the truth He gave us the Bible To confirm our views So unless you're a Christian, A Southern Baptist at that, You're going to hell! God don't cut no slack! We talk to God each day And God told us to ... stick it to the gays. Don't let 'em marry You know that that's not helpin' 'Cus Jesus hung with angels, And not with fairies! We talk to God each afternoon And God told us to ... put it to the Jews He told us in our Bible study cla** For 3,000 years them Jews Have been talkin' trash! Now we ain't like the Nazis And we ain't like the Klan We are here to support our fellow man To put him on the road To the promised land So they can visit our heaven 14,000-strong We met down in New Orleans And like a herd of sheep Follow the good shepherd's lead Marchin' with the Lord, Quoting Deuteronomy As WASP conservatives In his Southern army We called God, God called us back And God say it's a shame What's been happenin' there to the blacks All around the South Their churches have been burnin' They got no place to do Any of their wor-shipping. You better rebuild them churches Or soon you'll see That they'll expect to come and pray In 'your' community And congregatin' with white folks, Folks like you and me. Imagine a black light On my living Christmas tree! Now we don't like the h*mos We don't like the blacks We don't like the wicked, Who tired of playin' craps We don't go for dancin' And we don't trust the news And except for that one, We don't like the Jews.