Philip Dwight Jones - The Middle-Cla** Gentleman (Act 3 Scene 4) lyrics

SCENE IV (Count Dorante, Monsieur Jourdain, Madame Jourdain, Nicole) DORANTE: My dear friend, Monsieur Jourdain, how do you do? MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: Very well, sir, to render you my small services. DORANTE: And Madame Jourdain there, how is she? MADAME JOURDAIN: Madame Jourdain is as well as she can be. DORANTE: Well! Monsieur Jourdain, you are excellently well dressed! MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: You see. DORANTE: You have a fine air in that suit, and we have no young men at court who are better made than you. MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: Well! well! MADAME JOURDAIN: (Aside) He scratches him where it itches. DORANTE: Turn around. It's positively elegant. MADAME JOURDAIN: (Aside) Yes, as big a fool behind as in front. DORANTE: My faith, Monsieur Jourdain, I was strangely impatient to see you. You are the man in the world I esteem most, and I was speaking of you again this morning in the bedchamber of the King. MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: You do me great honor, sir. (To Madame Jourdain) In the King's bedchamber! DORANTE: Come, put on . . . MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: Sir, I know the respect I owe you. DORANTE: Heavens! Put on your hat; I pray you, no ceremony between us. MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: Sir . . . DORANTE: Put it on, I tell you, Monsieur Jourdain: you are my friend. MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: Sir, I am your humble servant. DORANTE : I won't be covered if you won't. MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: (Putting on his hat) I would rather be uncivil than troublesome. DORANTE: I am in your debt, as you know. MADAME JOURDAIN: Yes, we know it all too well. DORANTE: You have generously lent me money upon several occasions, and you have obliged me with the best grace in the world, a**uredly. MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: Sir, you jest with me. DORANTE: But I know how to repay what is lent me, and to acknowledge the favors rendered me. MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: I have no doubt of it, sir. DoRANTE: I want to settle this matter with you, and I came here to make up our accounts together. MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: There wife! You see your impertinence! DORANTE: I am a man who likes to repay debts as soon as I can. MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: (Aside to Madame Jourdain) I told you so. DORANTE: Let's see how much do I owe you. MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: (Aside to Madame Jourdain) There you are, with your ridiculous suspicions. DORANTE: Do you remember well all the money you have lent me? MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: I believe so. I made a little note of it. Here it is. Once you were given two hundred louis d'or. DORANTE: That's true. MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: Another time, six-score. DORANTE: Yes. MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: And another time, a hundred and forty. DORANTE: You're right. MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: These three items make four hundred and sixty louis d'or, which comes to five thousand sixty livres. DORANTE: The account is quite right. Five thousand sixty livres. MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: One thousand eight hundred thirty-two livres to your plume-maker. DORANTE: Exactly. MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: Two thousand seven hundred eighty livres to your tailor. DoRANTE: It's true. MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: Four thousand three hundred seventy-nine livres twelve sols eight deniers to your tradesman. DORANTE: Quite right. Twelve sols eight deniers. The account is exact. MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: And one thousand seven hundred forty-eight livres seven sols four deniers to your saddler. DORANTE: All that is true. What does that come to? MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: Sum total, fifteen thousand eight hundred livres. DORANTE: The sum total is exact: fifteen thousand eight hundred livres. To which add two hundred pistoles that you are going to give me, which will make exactly eighteen thousand francs, which I shall pay you at the first opportunity. MADAME JOURDAIN: (Aside) Well, didn't I predict it? MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: Peace! DORANTE: Will that inconvenience you, to give me the amount I say? MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: Oh, no! MADAME JOURDAIN: (Aside) That man is making a milk-cow out of you! MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: Be quiet! DoRANTE: If that inconveniences you, I will seek it somewhere else. MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: NO, Sir. MADAME JOURDAIN: (Aside) He won't be content until he's ruined you. MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: Be quiet, I tell you. DORANTE: You have only to tell me if that embarra**es you. MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: Not at all, sir. MADAME JOURDAIN: (Aside) He's a real wheedler! MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: Hush. MADAME JOURDAIN: (Aside) He'll drain you to the last sou. MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: Will you be quiet? DORANTE: I have a number of people who would gladly lend it to me; but since you are my best friend, I believed I might do you wrong if I asked someone else for it. MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: It's too great an honor, sir, that you do me. I'll go get it for you. MADAME JOURDAIN: (Aside) What! You're going to give it to him again? MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: What can I do? Do you want me to refuse a man of this station, who spoke about me this morning in the King's bedchamber? MADAME JOURDAIN: (Aside) Go on, you're a true dupe.