Paul Heaton - The Table lyrics

[Verse 1] This table has four sturdy legs A heart of very near wild oak When others would have screamed out loud, my friend This one never even spoke [Chorus] I've been sat upon (ooh) I've been spat upon (ooh) I've been treated like a bed Been carried like a stretcher when someone thinks they're dead I've been dined upon (ooh) I've been wined upon (ooh) I've been taken for a fool Taken for a desk when they should have been at school [Verse 2] This table's been pushed against the door When tempers, well tempers flare at night Banged upon with knuckles clenched my friend When someone thinks that they are right [Chorus] [Bridge] Tables only turn when tables learn Put me on a bonfire, watch me burn Treat me with some dignity, don't treat me like a slave Or I'll turn to the coffin in your grave [Chorus] [Bridge]